Establishing a Support Group
The UNC Approach
We believe that parents benefit most from the advice and support they offer one another. In a very real sense, widowed parents are the true “experts” on their situations.
Consequently, our support group meetings are designed to promote as much group discussion as possible. There is no fixed agenda and members bring to the table the issues they find to be most pressing and pertinent.
Group leader(s) do play an active role. They facilitate group discussion when needed, comment on important themes as they emerge, and periodically share relevant research-based information about grief and parenting. Specifically, we weave the following into the group discussion:
- Basic tenets of the Dual Process Model of Coping and Bereavement (Stroebe & Schut, 1999; 2010). This conceptual model provides a compelling and easy-to-understand framework to account for how members are adjusting to the challenges of widowed parenthood.
- A child-centered parenting approach. Group leaders encourage parenting practices that optimize adaptation in grieving children. We assist parents in problem-solving; ways to be emotionally available to their children while maintaining structure and consistency at home.
- A developmental perspective on how children understand death. A child’s conceptualization of death depends critically on his or her age and developmental status. Group leaders should be prepared to help parents appreciate their children’s grasp of death and customize their parenting accordingly.